Making words penetrate the density of my resistance

A huge element of my Waking Up last year, was leaving a cruel and angry man. In an attempt to shield myself from his damage, I grew smaller and smaller, withdrawing into the safety of non-responsiveness and inaction. Eventually I became a complete nothing. 

A Shaman introduced me to many balancing concepts, including angels, and my awareness grew exponentially. I believe the aid and guidance I received from the angels literally saved my life. I might still be there with that man - suffering in denial and bewilderment - had they not shown me the truth. I retreated to safety and went No Contact. But once I felt safe, I found it hard to connect with the angels anymore… or to meditate, or exercise… all I could do was sit here and wonder who I am supposed to be. 

Then I found Indira and this place. I still haven't reconnected with my angels, but I am determined to do so. I’m reading Lesson 2 of my first semester about Maya. My stuckness - “hurt, offended, depressed, resentful” - is appropriately before me on the pages. I think I read the same page 4 times! I’m trying to force my mind to get it, but those stupid false voices in my head keep interrupting. I’m doing the work, but sometimes it’s very hard to make it sink in.

If anyone has preparation tips - things they do to improve their ability to absorb the lessons - I would love to hear them.  I’ve noticed though, in this Google Blog thingy, that when someone asks for observations, and I click where it says: “2 comments” the words "2 comments" go away, but no comments appear!  Anywhoo…… thanks if anyone can help.

happy springtime

Happy springtime in your heart and soul. Tiny seeds planted in your soul hold the divine essence of your true nature. Be sure to nurture them so they can grow.

BEING

The heart is where you want to live. IT is everything. Your true home. In your heart you are loved and accepted. You are not  on earth to become someone else's perfect idea. You are not here to become your perfect idea. You are here to become free from all ideas, to be and express in a way that transcends all your ideas, all the ideas of the world.

In the words of Picasso, “My mother told me, if you become a soldier you will be a general. If you become a monk you will end up as a pope. Instead I became a painter and I wound up as Picasso.”

Is it not a lovely thought — to wind-up as yourself — in all your absolute and unique divinity?

Smudging

https://www.almanac.com/plant/sage

Probably you all know about smudging, which is usually done with the herb Sage. Sage grows wild in the Los Angeles area, which is actually a desert land. I am not sure about Austin. You can also grow it yourself. You can read the results of a scientific study on the benefits of smudging with sage by clicking the following links, if you like, but if you know about the ways of Native American and other ancient cultures, you already realize how beneficial sage can be:
(1) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17030480 (2) 
(2) http://www.greenmedinfo.com/article/medicinal-smoke-can-completely-eliminate-diverse-plant-and-human-pathogenic-bacteria-air

And you can read even more here: http://thespiritscience.net/2015/11/26/the-science-of-smudging-how-sage-actually-cleans-bacteria-in-the-air/

Slow Down

Slow down

Slow down is always a good exercise. If you are someone who runs here and there, slow down. Take a breath. Sit on the sofa for 5 or 15 minutes and do nothing but watch your thoughts. Watch your mind instead of trying to run from it. Sit quietly and watch the way your mind tries to distract you from watching it! Watch your mind try to draw you away from your sitting, back into the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvlW4bEjB5A

Be Where Your Body Is

Accidents happen to people all the time because their minds are not coordinated with their bodies. The mind is off on a safari in Africa while the body is right here. Be where your body is!

Be Where Your Body Is

Be present in your body. Breathe. Relax. Now. Right now. Take a breath. Let relaxation flood your body. Feel yourself being here now.

I AM

Before time, before creation, I AM. Without name, without labels, without time, without karma, without destiny. I AM. Without limitations. Without beliefs. Without definition. I AM.

Seeing

Today I was working with one of our school exercises -- "Ask to see something about yourself that you don't want to see." And I saw that behind my "niceness" is someone who wants something for being nice. Of course, I am polite to people. That's normal, and we don't deserve special credit for just being nice. But often I am nice because I want something -- if only to have that other person think that I am nice. I need to see and keep seeing the many layers that keep me from seeing/being in Truth. Anyone else have any thoughts about this? Kevin