Springtime Thoughts

Spring Daffodil I found on my walk here.

Since I am in a new time zone with changing weather patterns—including April showers and refreshing air (unlike the cities I have been living in) which I love and many people complain about—the rain and cold that is,—anxious as they are for summer sun…I often think of this angel writing, which you may have read—I first wrote it for a monthly lesson called,  'Angels Everywhere!'—which turned out to be one of my favorite lessons...

...but it was written at a very difficult time, following the death of my only sister, Sue, on a cold grey Christmas morning, from a long painful illness.

The first words of that lesson were, “Are angels with us always? Yes! Always!”

And the lesson went onto say…"Angels love all kinds of weather. Angels are not dependent on the sun for light the way we are. Angels shine with their own light. You shine with your own light too. When you are living from your heart even the most somber winter day can seem warm and peaceful—because real peace is independent of any experience. Even the most somber moment can be filled with peace—because peace is the backdrop upon which everything is written.”

Over the years, the more I write, read, and study the lessons, the more I work on practicing the teachings—the more I imbibe. Because as the lessons say, What good are spiritual teachings if you cannot apply them to everyday life? If they do not offer you personal transformation?

The more I work with the angelic teachings, the more they became part of my life. It’s one thing to adapt to the outside weather—but what about adapting to inside weather? What about dealing with the changes, not only in weather patterns, but the weather patterns of our lives?

If you are still buffeted about by people, situations, and events—remember, you have your lessons. You have the teachings of the angels to guide you and remind you to go within — that you are more than your body, more than emotions, more than passing thoughts.

Just yesterday I was given some misinformation by a government official, which meant a huge (for me) financial loss. I was shocked, but not defeated. It did not throw me into anxiety the way it once would have. I just felt  the shock and stayed with it—instead of letting thoughts add unnecessary emotional and mental suffering. I stayed with what was.

I researched and took some actions to rectify the situation, because I felt that what she had told me was not accurate. In the end, I found out she was wrong. The whole drama had been just…a drama.

The positive outcome of this is that I was given a chance to see that there was a transformation within me. Real transformation often happens so deeply and slowly that we do not realize it has taken place. It’s not like those sudden “changes” we all have had—you know—where you think you have “changed” forever. You get high about it and maybe tell everyone. You believe it is permanent. Then it all collapses and you feel like you are just the same old person in pain, which brings even greater pain.

This is because there is still a “you” there to get high. There is a “you” who believes you have “changed.” In truth, there is no “you” and never was. “You” is always thinking…thinking…thinking. But a thought of change is not change. “You” cannot change because you just don’t exist.

When true change comes, it is not “you” changing—it is a bit of you being chipped away, the way a sculpture chips away bits of rock to reveal the sculpture that was always there, hidden within the rock.

So I was enabled to see—that some of the old me was gone in that moment. I say in that moment, because if I talk about the future, then it is “me” doing the talking—putting “me” into it. There is no me and never could be. There is only what IS.

We only have this moment. When this is remembered, we can sink deep into the present moment and rise higher than whatever problem we face. This is what happened for me the other day. I could have been controlled by what the official told me. I could have let it sink me into suffering. If I had done that, I wouldn’t have felt compelled to research the information and find out for myself what was true.

Some part of me, the practical mind—the mind that works for us and is our friend—questioned what she said. So even in the midst of shock, I was able to take constructive action. I was willing to be wrong— those of you who work with me personally in seminars—may have heard me say this, as I often do when working with someone: I am willing to be wrong.

And I mean that. But…I am also willing to be right. Both have different outcomes, and both are okay because…I  am willing to accept either possibility—being wrong or being right.
 
When we can come to this place: I am willing to be  wrong. I am willing to be right. I am willing to accept either possibility—then there is inner quiet. Inner peace. The struggle to be “right” and “win” is gone. You realize that the spiritual journey is not about competition—that’s the way of the world. The way of Spirit is just to be and let life unfold—discover what is and what will be.

So the other day when I heard this shocking news, I just stayed with the shock. I noticed my mind wanting to interfere—remember that darkness attacks when we are in a weakened position—and tell me how wrong I was, how I had made a mistake, how my future was doomed, as well as my present.

But at that moment, there was sentry at the doorway of my mind, watching carefully—and I did not let those harmful hurtful thoughts in the door where they could take over and destroy my serenity.

In the end, I called back this same woman with the information I had and she confirmed that she had given me wrong information. Now, that was a relief at the financial level, since it will make life easier for me—but I felt no high, no elation—because I had experienced no low, no depression. Shock, yes, but that was an immediate reaction. What’s important,is that I did not let it devolve into a low, into depression or anxiety.

I know myself well enough to know that my “normal" reaction would have been terrible anxiety—because I would have let anxious thoughts take over. But this time…it was different. And I can attribute that to  the spiritual work I do constantly on myself. I consciously work on myself everyday. I write everyday. I hang out with angelic energy. I read other spiritual books. I read and work with the lessons.

I say this not to say how dedicated I am — but to emphasize what can happen when we are devoted to our spiritual life. I an SO grateful for the angels in my life, for all my spiritual teachers, the ancient seers who left behind great books and scriptures — that have helped release me from being “me.”

And I continue to work on myself, to read and write the lessons, to practice what I write. This is the only way I know for deep inner transformation to happen — we must put into practice what we learn, in order to let the learning deepen into the heart. I am just grateful that at least for that moment I was spared the suffering my own thoughts could have led me to. And that I was given the energy to find out for myself that what she had said was wrong, so that I could fix the problem. It is certainly a relief at a financial level, but even more so—a victory of light over darkness, which is what matters most.