yes, I have discovered here in OUR SCHOOL that only ONE can be happy. I always thought "I" had to be happy, the little "me"---and I am learning that there is something beyond the "me"--a super me! A me that rocks with glee--as our new school song says. More and more I feel like I am a child swinging on a swing from a tree, high above my troubles--I used to think I was every trouble. The School is helping me to observe myself and my problems from a new level. I can't really explain it. I used to let my negative thoughts take control of me. More and more I can just watch them like I am watching a bad movie, even when I am unable to walk out of the movie. But you know what? The other day my thoughts were creating a bad movie for me and I WAS able to walk out. I literally took a long walk instead of letting the thoughts control me. I love you all even if I never see you in real life, I see you here, I see you inside of me! Your fellow classmate, Kevin
Dear Kevin,
ReplyDeletewhat you wrote was the first I read in this new week, this monday morning...
and it makes me happy, better it touches me, it is a deeper happiness!
Thank you for your words and I feel the same, maybe not exactly the same -
my sentence is "just notice" and it helps me being me or being better in contact with the ONE we are all -
it helps me not creating feelings I don't need -
and it helps me watching what happens in my life, for example:
Three weeks ago I hurt my left hand (a distortion), and in three weeks there is a concert where they asked me to play with the recorder (I studied that), now it is not possible for me to play...but there is a beautiful song for two sopran and continuo and I would love to sing it, but I'm also afraid (I didn't study that).
But the music is so fantastic - if you all have the possibility to here it, it is angel music, HEAR IT - it is from
Francois Couperin, Lecons de tenebres -
and now the best! I asked my daughter Juliane to sing with me (she has a beautiful soft voice) she is 15 years, and she said yes! The next problem I thought (I thought)was the organ, that there is not enough time, and then Markus, Julianes father, decided to play the continuo, he is cellist.
Now I can't find a new problem - we do it!
And I really love this music and I want to sing it, but I am also afraid to do it - but it seems to become reality, I notice my fear and also my wish to sing with my daughter and Markus - it will be a new experience and we will do our best!
Now I wrote a lot!
Thank you all for being here in our school, I don't write very often, but I'm always with you and I'm happy being ME!
Love from Antje
Hi Antje, I wish I could be there to hear all the music of your family. I will look for the CD you mention.
ReplyDeleteWe often think that feeling fear means we cannot do the thing we fear. But fear does not have to be our master. We can feel the fear and do it anyway! Which you are doing!
Good luck!
Dear Judy,
ReplyDeletethank you for your words!
I know you are right and it is so interesting what I can create to stay in this fear...I cought a cold!!
But it is ok, next week it is gone, I am sure!
Now I'm very soft with me and it is all right in this moment...because there is no wrong moment, I learnt that!!
Love, Antje
Hi Antje,
ReplyDeleteit looks like, that it is possible for me to attend the concert and I am looking forward to it.
Love
Monika